Journal Entry from Monday's Alumni Event

On January 5th, 2015 I attended a "Rock the Dock" alumni event in San Diego. The MV Explorer is parting ways with the Semester at Sea program and being sold to a Greek cruise line in a few months. A handful of us from Spring 2011 returned to board the ship one last time.

As we were told on our first night at sea – every time you return to the ship after you first disembark, it is like coming home. When I saw the MV from the 5 freeway my face cracked open into a smile. I would know it anywhere, with its string of modest white lights draped over its smoke stacks. It seemed bigger than I remembered from the outside, but once inside, it seemed smaller. I had forgotten about the low ceilings and how narrow the hallways are. I sat on a bed in a room identical to the one I had lived in and was shocked that I had lived in this decently sized walk-in closet for four months. Although, what first hit me about re-boarding the ship was the smell. Another thing I would know anywhere. I wish you could bottle smells, I would buy “ship smell” in bulk and use it plunge myself into memories of what it was like to live on this floating campus. The antiseptic smell of the ship, mixed with the algae smell of the sea. The strongest memories were of smallest things. How cold it was inside the ship an how humid outside of it, and how if you sat by the doorway on either side you could feel the rush of cold or warm air every time the automatic sliding glass doors would open. I remembered the comically loud rattling of the union during rough seas, and the distinct patterns of the carpet. 

The view from Deck 6

As I searched in vain for a quiet place to sit and reflect I remembered how difficult it had been to find such a place 4 years ago. I recalled feeling closterphobic in the wide open space of the Atlantic. Never alone. When I finally settled down in a place to think and observe it was on deck 6, at the back, facing the ship, where I spent most of my voyage. I smiled to myself remembering how things were always wet back here, and how the tables all had holes in them for umbrellas that were never anywhere to be found, which is probably because they would have been instruments of death in the afternoon winds. The strongest memory that returned was the memory of vulnerability. In my journal and in my blog I had rambled on about community. The community feel of “being in the same boat” and the families forged by traveling. What I had conveniently forgotten to remember was how vulnerable I felt the whole time. Just – being away. I couldn’t have pointed to my position on a map. I couldn’t have called home, I couldn’t become more prepared than I already was. No time to rethink wardrobe or reading materials. It is not unlike being given a choice of tools for a toolbox, and then being dropped from a helicopter into a forest on the equator and realizing too late that you had packed for a cold-weather adventure. I was heading off to new places, some of which I couldn’t pronounce until I arrived. No distractions readily available, no Facebook to browse, Netflix to watch, or phone to text with. I had my thoughts, and nothing but time on that ship to exercise them. 

Just I had as a student, I found myself wandering the ship, trying to connect with it. I ate snacks on Deck 7, where I still felt wholly uncomfortable and unwanted, and I went down to room 3144 which I automatically tried to enter by leaning my whole body weight against the 100-lb door. I walked to Jason’s room, and found I couldn’t remember which number it was. I’m very sorry this ship wont be around much longer. If I were to do semester at sea again, I would want it to be on the MV Explorer. For all of its flaws, it is a magnificent place. And it took me safely around the world. You cant ask it for more. 

                                       Room 3144                                                                     I remember this view...

I don’t dream about the ship anymore, but I do still have dream-like memories of what it was like to lie on the hot deck where you could barely feel the breeze whipping around you. Or fall asleep to the hum of the engines underneath your cabin. Or see the whole horizon shoot up past the window of your breakfast table. Semester at sea sometimes doesn’t feel like it was a part of this life. I remember it like it was a past life. Part of that is because of how drugged I was. Malarone, Scopolamine, Dramamine…I really was only fully conscious about half the time. But as we expected, there were no big life decisions brought about by this trip, but rather a slower, deeper shift in our worldview. Not a dramatic call for action, but a widened perspective. I may not remember half the things I did in Africa, but I remember how I felt when I was there. The further I get from my shipboard experience, the more I realize I internalized.

I would do it again in a heartbeat. 

Just prescribe me the Scopolamine. 

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(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•.

Look who I found!!!

My friends!

Gotta love magnetic walls...

The Union

Representing S11!

My last view

Post-voyage reflection: sorry guys, this is unedited...

“I feel like this is the real world and we are going back to sleep” –Jason on re-entry

“if you wake up to the voice telling you the date and time, shake yourself, you are having a nightmare.” –Captain Jeremy Kingston

I have to figure out, “What is this thing that is America?” to travel is to return to the place you came from and see it anew.

“Every time you return to the ship after the first time it is like coming home.” - Rosalyn

Dean Dan told us to pick a word that represents this ship to us. The word that whenever I hear it I will think of the ship: UNION!

“The world is a book and those who don’t travel only ready the first page” – commencement speaker

I’m surprised how easy it is to slide back into my routine.
I miss everyone but I don’t feel lonely, I feel connected

Back on land for a few weeks now, I thought I was having a fairly easy re-entry, but it seems to be getting harder with time. I’ve had trouble making sense of it all. Turns out time to think is not all you need in order to process. I was thinking about the people in Ghana and India but especially Ghana – and what it is about them that is so different yet so familiar. What I think it is: they are totally unplugged. These families don’t gather around a TV set after dinner. They don’t communicate with people in the next room via texting or even write papers for school on the computer. They are fully present with each other and the world around them every moment of the day. They are not an escapist culture – they don’t retreat behind headphones or zone out to movies for hours on end while mindlessly shoving food into their mouths without giving a second though to where their next handful might come from. And beyond that – or maybe because of it – they are a grateful people. They dance not because they are carefree or bored, but because they have life inside them and they want to show it. They are spiritual, if not religious, and they are connected. Ghana may be a difficult place to live – it may be disadvantaged economically or whatever, but they have one or two things that we don’t, and I envy them with all of my heart because of it. They taught me that you can’t have it all. Not only because it disrupts the balance that nature put in place but also because whenever you have more than you need, you sacrifice contentment for gratification and you face inevitable anxiety. Only those with something to lose fear loss. If you are privileged, you miss out on an experience that your body was made for – fighting for itself. You can never have the experience of starting off with nothing and building your own fortune. It is easier to measure how far you’ve gone in life if you start at the starting line. How much of a blessing really is a “head start” if it is true that you must sacrifice something else for it? Then maybe that explains the extreme unhappiness and discontentment in this country. Ironically, we think more is the answer – more money, more time, more distraction, more pills. I think the answer is “less.” Uncomplicate your life and see how you feel. Start with noticing how much you have in comparison to how much you need. I learned in one of my psych classes that they have finally proven that money doesn’t buy happiness. Beyond a certain level of income (this is where minimum wage comes from by the way) money is not even an indication of happiness. If you have enough to live off of, you are no worse off emotionally than a billionaire. In fact, it seems to me that the less you have the happier you are to have it. One cookie in the hand is worth two on someone else’s table? Here are some other ideas: There is something to be said for an honest day’s physical labor if it’s your own house you are building, or your own bed. There is a theory that food tastes better if you cook it yourself – I believe a house feels more like a home if you build it yourself. Ghanaian’s lives might be shorter than ours, but they are slower. It balances out…

When I am asked the annoying question, “what was your favorite country?” I respond by saying, “I had the most fun in South Africa, if I could return to one it would be Vietnam, but I liked Ghana the best.” It is the country that was most enlightening and most different from what I was expecting. It was the most different place we went – it might also have been the scariest. Dean Dan told us during his last speech that we have an obligation now to interrupt people when they are talking. We should interject with things like “when I was in Ghana that was not my experience…” The Dark Continent? I don’t think so.

I made a wonderful discovery: The world is a small place.
A long life is not about increasing the number of days, but slowing each one down. 

ambassadors ball

it was a masquerade...

me and xuan

arriving to SD!

we saw mexico first...

THE UNITED STATES!

my fav of the bunch from that morning

wavin to parents

my last view of the ship....

Hawaii: “Give me liberty or give me dock time!”

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(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•.

Back in the good old US of A! It was very strange waking up and looking out the window as I do every morning and seeing land. That in itself would have been exciting enough after 11 days at sea but to know that it was The United States, the place we left 4 months ago, home, the closing of the circle, was a lot to process. We watched it come closer and closer and finally around lunch time people starting turning on cell phones. It took me a while to figure out how to use mine again, and I kept losing it because I would forget I had it.

Pre-port for Hawaii was as silly as we thought it would be. “Um – the exchange rate here is 1-to-1, and the water is safe to drink, and people speak English. Oh - and look out for uneven pavement.” We did learn a bit about the Hawaiian culture. Some of the Hilo students told us not to bring any rocks or sand back to the ship; it will bring a curse upon us. They were dead serious. They said they wouldn’t want to sail on if someone tried it. Like in Taiwan, we arrived before we arrived. We stopped earlier in the day in Honolulu for fuel. It was BY FAR the strangest part of the whole trip. I have seen us pull up to almost every country but it was my own that felt the most surreal. First of all it was gorgeous. I could look down into the crystal clear water and see a giant sea turtle. Ilana saw a whale. We pulled up along side and there were people in cafes that were waving to us. I bet they had no idea who we were or where we were coming from. I bet they didn’t know that we were coming home after 4 months of international travel and they were the first Americans we were seeing. “We made it” was all I could think. 4 months, an 11 day crossing – and here we are. I really can’t explain how bizarre it felt. We weren’t allowed off in Honolulu but we stayed there all day. I could use my phone and we could look off the ship to see the mountains and the trees and the harbor. We went through immigration and Marty told us later, “Did you notice that the only immigration officers that brought guns on board were the US ones?” The security in the States was the strictest, even more so than India where we had to go through airport security every time we re-boarded the ship.

Ilana and I got off the ship together in the rain. It wasn't raining heavily so we started walking towards the beach. Eventually it let up and we ran into these two guys who were sitting outside of their truck by the water drinking beer. They stopped us and asked if we would like some. It was our first taste of island hospitality. They were mildly interested in where we had come from, but not as interested as I thought they would be. The SAS staff had starting warning us that we are going to want to talk about this trip more than people are going to want to hear about it, and this was our first exposure to that. "We came on a ship" is a much less useful conversation starter than I expected. Both men were unemployed and just hanging out on the island. They tried to make us eat raw oysters (so raw that they were still alive) but we kindly refused. We headed down the road for another mile and found a small beach. When the rain stopped we could walk around in the bay and lay on the hot black sand. For lunch that day I had a caesar wrap -unimpressive I know, but still – American food! We walked home instead of hitchhiking (which is legal here) and I went to dinner at a real American diner. There were 8 of us and it was like we were on crack. We ordered the strangest combinations of food. Pancakes and eggs and pasta, I had mac and cheese and chocolate milk and part of a waffle. I pretty sure we confused our waitress.

The next day was beautiful for a number of reasons. First, I finally got the bagel and cream cheese I had been craving for months and then went to another beach where they had huge lava rocks for climbing on. We explored the tide pools and found a tie-dye crab and a bunch of odd muscles and a ton of fish. The four girls, me, Sara, Ilana, and Alison traversed way far out on the rocks away from the beach dwellers. It was a slippery climb but we made it. We sat out on the edge of the rocks and fought the urge to jump off of them into the water. We were mostly silent, there wasn't much to say to each other anymore, we were comfortable just sitting there and knowing that we were all feeling the same things. I was wearing a lei that a woman on the street had given to me as a welcome to Hawaii. It was beautiful, made out of huge fresh pink and white flowers. I took it off and we all held a corner and said a silent prayer of thanks to the sea for bringing us here safely. Then I flung the lei out into the water and we watched the current carry it away.

 “Next stop home.” I kept saying in my head.

Boarding the ship for the last time!

that says, "next port of call - San Diego"

dinner on the ship before taking off

last view of hawaii

Taiwan: The Unexpected Port

Hey guys! As some of you know, I am actually back on land by this point. Our voyage ended the morning of the 24th. Its taken a while to say goodbye to people and take friends to the airport but things are beginning to calm down. Blog posts will end soon, but these last three or so will come in quick succession...anyway, on to Taiwan...

one of the famous "night markets." I ate a corndog off the street

"Life is an adventure. The universe brings me everything I need in the perfect time and in the perfect way."

“This Earth is not something we inherited from our parents, it is something we are borrowing from our children.”  - Awakening the Dreamer (look it up!)

Emily and I

So it turns out that there are some politics that prevent us from sailing directly from China to Taiwan. So we had to make a stop someplace else first. Guess where it was? Japan! The island we were at is Japanese owned, but it is the furthest one from the mainland. The place looked great and people were parasailing and rowing up to our boats all morning. We ended up staying there a few more hours than necessary because we drove over some poor guy’s fishing net and got it stuck in our propeller so divers had to go fish it out. Later that week we were circled by a Japanese coast guard helicopter, when we asked the captain about it, he said he was unaware.

It rained almost our whole first day in Taiwan but like the good sports we are we put on raincoats and sloshed our way to the train station to catch a train to Taipei. No one was super into it. Taiwan was feeling like our third version of China, plus we were exhausted. The highlight of the day was going up Taipei 101 to see the view. Taipei 101 in the second tallest building in the world right now, although it is probably about to be eclipsed. It was very foggy but we went up to the 90th something floor (in less than 40 seconds). We decided to take a nap up there before heading back down :)

a view from the top! look how small the cars are for reference

a few from the bottom

 After lunch our second day Jason and I went out with Ana and her mom to the Peace Garden and a Confucius Temple and then to an excellent dumpling restaurant. Then for desert we walked around the corner to a placed called Chocoholic that is a chocolate restaurant and I had a nutella crepe on a green-tea tortilla. We lastly headed back to Taipei 101 to see the view at night and Jason and I made it up for free. It was less foggy so the view was incredible.

the 101 at night

was this invented for me??

The next and final morning I had my final SAS trip to the Taroko Gorge which is about 2.5 hours away by train. It was a trip of about 40 people, but only 7 of us were students. We had the entire field office and media team, half the medical staff, LLCs and Life Long Learners. It was one of the better SAS trips I’ve done and I think it was because of the lack of students. I knew it was going to be a great day  when we all did the electric slide on the train platform in front of a number of confused Taiwanese people. We ate lunch at a hotel and I had the strangest meal of the whole trip: pasta, corn, carrots, pigs in a blanket and matzo balls. Our guide, who was a professor that was a volunteer for the tour organization, took us to many of the famous stops along the gorge, including the base of a 3000-meter cliff. Guess what? Turns out Toroko Gorge is another of the wonders of the world, just like Halong Bay which we tried so hard to make it to. The Universe provides...

my favorite photo of the bunch, this is the ship's photographer Brittney...can you see me in her lens?

from left to right: krista from the field office, Alyssa an LLC and Faith, MY LLC

I like this one too - we were all in awe

the couple holding hands is Betty and Boyd, the oldest people on the ship, they are almost 90

Me and bff Doctor Laura!

The ride back was long but we made it back for dinner (1.5 hours after on ship time, we were the last people out in port). I stayed out on the deck to watch our last international port disappear.

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We are now experiencing our 11 day Pacific crossing. An odd thing about this leg of the journey is the way it appears on the map on my cabin wall. I have spent so much time looking at that map, drawing a mental line across it and always using it to have a picture of where we are. In a few days, we will be sailing off the map. We will literally disappear off one side of it and re-appear on the other. On the map it looks like we are far from the states when we are actually pretty close and getting closer all the time. We experienced our very own Groundhog day when we crossed over the International Date Line. At midnight on April 12th we set our clocks back so that we woke up and it was still April 12th. Marty played “I Got You Babe” over the sound system to wish us a happy groundhog day. It took me all morning to figure out the reference.

We went slightly off course on our way to Hawaii; we had to move out of the waters we were on because there was missile-testing happening. Oh, the things that don’t make it onto the website or into the Voyage blog.

Last night we saw a light on the horizon. It was the first sign of human existence that we have seen in 10 days (although we did see birds when we got near the midway islands). We thought it was a ship but we later learned that it was a lighthouse. It is not to mark land, but rather a reef that is a danger to crossing ships. Hawaii two days out!!